Dull, Predictable Action Comedy Disappoints [VENICE 2024]

When I sat down to watch “Wolfs” in the Sala Darsena at the Venice Film Festival, I think I might also have stepped into a time machine, because this thing is straight out of the 2002 action comedy playbook. It’s essentially a spiritual successor to “Ocean’s Eleven,” but while that felt fresh — even though, ironically, it was a remake of a then 40-year-old film — “Wolfs” shows its age. George Clooney and Brad Pitt have wonderful chemistry together, as always, and they make sense as two wily, slightly over-the-hill fixers, but “Wolfs” itself is relatively uninspired.

A district attorney (Amy Ryan) finds herself in an all-too-familiar pickle for a public official: Stuck in the penthouse suite of a hotel with the body of a dead sex worker, desperately trying to figure out how to avoid a scandal. The solution? Call in a fixer, who provides a one-stop service to make all these pesky little problems disappear. That’s where George Clooney comes in. (His character’s name is simply “Margaret’s Man,” to differentiate him from Brad Pitt’s “Pam’s Man.”) Although he begins the problem-solving process, he’s interrupted fairly quickly by Pam’s Man, who has been sent by the owner of the hotel (Frances McDormand) to ensure that the job is done properly and the hotel doesn’t get any negative publicity.

Since these two are lone wolves, they’re none-too-thrilled at the idea of being forced to work together. But they have to get over it pretty quickly, because they’re faced with two major complications. Firstly, there’s a backpack containing several bricks of heroin stashed in the room. And secondly, the alleged sex worker’s not quite as dead as they expected. Can these two macho assassin types get over their differences long enough to finish the job? We can only hope.

Austin Abrams is the unexpected star of the show as Kid, the sex worker who’s not actually a sex worker, just a college student trying to do a solid for a drug-dealing classmate who got in way over his head. He steals the spotlight from Clooney and Pitt, which is traditionally not an easy thing to do. Abrams’ comedy skills are a delightful surprise — he runs like a giant inflatable arm-flailing tube man who just watched about six hours of parkour videos on YouTube while doing lines of coke, and his laboriously detailed motel monologue is a standout moment of the film. The whole rival assassin schtick is least grating when they’re bouncing it off of him, as he softens them both and creates a protective instinct that gives them both some discernible character.

That’s another major issue of the film: In trying to highlight how similar the two fixers are to one another, “Wolfs” neglects to imbue them with any defining qualities to distinguish one from the other. And furthermore, their taciturn behavior, tendency to speak only in grunts, and unwillingness to share any personal details about themselves makes them something even less interesting than mirror images of one another — they’re little more than empty vessels. George Clooney and Brad Pitt may have generational talent when it comes to screen presence and charisma, but it holds little value when placed in the service of characters as underdeveloped and dull as these two. And the roles are so securely in their wheelhouse that both actors seem to forget that they might need to be the ones to add depth or nuance to the characters, that there was once a time when they didn’t just sleepwalk through film performances but actually act.

And let’s get real, the oldie stuff is a little played out. All their little grunts and Advil-popping exploits makes them feel like they’re auditioning for a spy version of “Grumpy Old Men” — something that is slightly undercut by the fact that George Clooney and Brad Pitt look like … well, George Clooney and Brad Pitt. Their particular brand of masculinity also probably would have played better about a decade and a half ago. As it stands, their whole tough guy routine comes across as tired and somewhat lazy.

So “Wolfs” is something of a disappointment. Between the thinly sketched characters that it’s almost impossible to care about, the paint-by-numbers directorial style that does the action sequences no favors, and the fact that although it’s billed as a comedy, it takes itself way too seriously, there’s not much to recommend it. Unless you like watching George Clooney standing around looking slightly constipated, that is.

You know what “Wolfs” is? It’s the perfect movie to watch on a plane when you’re pretty confident you might be dozing on and off. “Wolfs” is blatantly obvious, with no surprises or twists you can’t see coming a mile away, but sometimes you want the dull comfort of a movie that’s so thoroughly committed to doing absolutely nothing. It wouldn’t have set the world on fire if it was released 20 years ago, and now it’s just a relic.

“Wolfs” will receive a limited theatrical release on September 20, before hitting Apple TV+ on September 27.