Gillian Anderson Discusses Pleasure, Powerful Women, and Secret Fantasies

In the early stages of researching Want, a book about women’s sexual fantasies, the thing that shocked Gillian Anderson the most was the prevalence of shame. The book, inspired by Nancy Friday’s 1973 classic My Secret Garden, features anonymous letters from women sharing their sexual fantasies. Anderson noted how many women still seek permission to voice their desires, even privately. Surprisingly, the 56-year-old actress discovered she wasn’t immune to this either. When asked to submit her own fantasy, Anderson kept postponing it. “I’m not a prude by any stretch and I can say any words out loud. But writing it down? I got really uncomfortable,” she admitted.

Speaking from a hotel in Marrakech on a break from filming a western in Canada, Anderson refrains from revealing which letter was hers. Balancing gratitude and some frustration, she comments on her bustling work schedule, “I’m so fucking lucky.” Yet, her honest expressions of exasperation, “fucking hell,” show a more relatable side. This blend of sincerity and humor is something the British public, who see themselves reflected in Anderson, have come to appreciate. Staying in London for decades, Anderson embraces her Britishness more openly now than when she first moved.

This frankness is partly why Anderson was chosen to curate Want. Anderson’s portrayal of sex therapist Jean Milburn in the Netflix series Sex Education inspired the book’s publishers. Through Want, Anderson sifted through thousands of anonymously submitted fantasies. It recalls the raw emotional impact of My Secret Garden, filled with fantasies that left unforgettable images. From marital relations in the 1970s that now seem like marital rape to women liberating their innermost thoughts, Anderson remarks, “Lots of women still struggle to speak about these things, even among their friends, let alone with their partners.” What stands out in Want is how taboos and generational anxieties have shifted since the ’70s.

Anderson acknowledges the safe space fantasy provides, making clear in the introduction that few women would enact violent fantasies in real life. The inclusion of numerous perspectives, such as navigating queer love and sex, shows both the diversity and the lingering conservative views among the contributors. Despite differing perceptions, Anderson aims to provide understanding and comfort.

I had a surreal experience in 1996 when I was voted world’s sexiest woman by readers of FHM magazine … It felt so preposterous to me.

Readers are treated to a range of fantasies, from a longing for ordinary niceness to wild desires. While some fantasies feel influenced by contemporary media like Fifty Shades of Grey, others offer humor, such as a fantasy involving a dentist’s chair. Anderson provides context at the beginning of each chapter, revealing that she is often a director in her own fantasies, symbolizing control and privacy.

What’s fascinating is Anderson herself. Unlike Nancy Friday, Anderson is a long-standing sex symbol, ever since her role as Dana Scully in The X-Files. “In 1996, when I was voted world’s sexiest woman by readers of FHM magazine,” she reminisces, highlighting the surreal nature of public perception versus her real life. Anderson agrees that her public persona helps ordinary women feel more comfortable with their fantasies. “I’m pretty understanding and nonjudgmental, and I try to be as inclusive as humanly possible,” she says, believing that this openness makes contributors feel safer.

I hope people are entertained and moved by the book. I hope it brings joy, and laughter. And understanding. And self-acceptance.

The book dives into taboo subjects, like a straight woman fantasizing about a female coworker, suggesting deeply rooted societal conservatism. Anderson pushes back against the notion of mainstream acceptance, pointing out the bravery in simply pressing ‘send’ on a fantasy submission. “The fact that some women felt brave enough at all to press send is remarkable,” she insists.

A turning point for Anderson, both personally and professionally, was her role in the BBC thriller The Fall. Before this, she had grown frustrated with the roles she was landing. “Reading a woman like Stella on the page after reading many, many scripts where I was starting to lose hope felt like an incredible breakthrough,” Anderson reveals. Portraying DS Stella Gibson, she found empowerment in a character unashamed of her sexuality, which had a profound impact on Anderson’s own sense of self.

The experience of playing such a liberated character allowed Anderson to express more of her humor and confidence publicly, which carried over into her work in Sex Education. “Only in the last three or four years have I felt comfortable enough in my own skin and my place as a public person to reveal more of that aspect of me,” she shares.

It’s good for my boys, and for other women to see that I’m adding things to my life right at the point when some people think I should be subtracting.

Anderson feels she’s on an exciting career upswing. Other ventures, like launching a soft drinks brand called G Spot, have expanded her portfolio. She emphasizes the importance of starting new endeavors later in life, encouraging other women to embrace change. “Fuck it, even though I’m 60, I’m going to start something new,” she declares, showing her determination to push forward rather than retract.

In this spirit, Anderson approached Want with the hope that it would help women articulate their desires and foster honesty. Given her ability to operate seamlessly between the US and UK, Anderson concludes, “It feels like my cells are American, and my soul is British.” Her unique blend of experiences continues to resonate powerfully with audiences on both sides of the Atlantic.

• Want: Sexual Fantasies by Anonymous, collected by Gillian Anderson, is published in the UK by Bloomsbury on 5 September, priced at £18.99, and in the US by Abrams Press on 18 September, priced at $28.