Never Imagined an Internet Existed

Drew Barrymore is reflecting on her Playboy cover from nearly 30 years ago, now viewing it through the lens of being a mother to two daughters.

The actress shared her thoughts in a recent Instagram post titled “PHONE HOME,” referencing her 1982 film E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial. Barrymore expressed her desire to share her experiences as a parent in a vulnerable way.

In her post, Barrymore reminisced about her unconventional childhood in Hollywood, where she was exposed to adult environments and began working at a young age. She also recalled her photoshoot for the January 1995 issue of Playboy, which was right before she turned 20.

“I was around plenty of hedonistic scenarios at parties and even in my own home, where the viewing was of highly sensitive natures and caused me tremendous shame,” she wrote. “We, as kids, are not meant to see these images. And, yes, I was even a big exhibitionist when I was young due to the environments I was in. I thought of it as art, and I still do not judge it.”

Barrymore continued, “But when I did a chaste artistic moment in Playboy in my early 20s, I thought it would be a magazine that was unlikely to resurface because it was paper. I never knew there would be an internet. I didn’t know so many things.”

Now, as a parent, the Drew Barrymore Show host is determined to protect her kids the way she wished she had been protected. She never imagined that children would face the same level of excess and access due to modern technology and social media. This is why she is not ready for her daughters, Olive, 12, and Frankie, 10, to have smartphones yet.

She explained that she was emancipated at 14 and moved into her first apartment, which made her feel like she started her life over on her own terms.

“But in a consistent message to myself, I found that there was no one to take care of me,” Barrymore wrote. “My own mother was lambasted for allowing me to get so out of control. I have so much empathy for her now because I am a mother. And none of us is perfect.”

Thanks to the kindness people have shown her throughout her life, she now aims to reciprocate that goodwill. The Charlie’s Angels star wants to protect children from scenarios where they cannot control the dynamics and rhetoric that get put on record and potentially haunt them one day.

“I messed up in public when I was 13, and people were shocked,” Barrymore recalled of her own traumatic childhood experience. “I was on the cover of the National Enquirer and every other magazine as a washed-up tragedy, and I thought that would be my narrative forever. I wanted to disappear from the planet and never show my face again.”

Instead, the 50 First Dates star said she “put one foot in front of the other and put my life back on track, only to make more mistakes along the way, but that is life. We make mistakes. And people have been so kind to me. Forgiven me. And cheered me on as I grew up.”

“So yeah, it is also my karma and life’s work to cheer people on right back!” Barrymore added. “We all fall and rise. Over and over. Life’s roller coaster. And what a beautiful ride it is. But here on earth is a timed-out journey. We must make the best of it and take care of each other in the process.”