Stephen Colbert comments on how much older Walz appears compared to Harris

Stephen Colbert has humorously weighed in on the public’s fascination with comparing the ages and appearances of Tim Walz and Kamala Harris.

The “Late Night Show with Stephen Colbert” host opened Tuesday’s episode by delving into what he jokingly referred to as the “big, important questions.” Born in April 1964, Tim Walz is just six months older than his running mate, Kamala Harris, who was born in October of the same year—a fact that seems to perplex many.

“Uh, what’s up with that guy’s face?” Colbert mocked, referring to the widespread view that Walz, 60, appears much older than Harris, 59. “Oh, oh, I think I know the reason! Women in America aren’t allowed to age,” Colbert joked before pulling up Harris’s official portrait, commenting that it “takes a lot of creams to look that good at 59.”

Meanwhile, Colbert quipped that Walz probably “washes his face with Dawn dish soap.” He then noted that Walz has likely heard the public’s comments on his appearance. “Walz has heard your cruel jabs at his appearance, America,” he said to the audience.

The comedian then discussed what Walz himself blamed for his aging appearance: teaching. Before shifting to his congressional career in 2006, Walz was a high school teacher. “You do not leave that job with a full head of hair, trust me,” Walz wrote in a July post, noting he spent 20 years supervising the school lunchroom.

Colbert humorously expanded on Walz’s statement: “No one leaves that job with a full head of hair because lunchroom bullies steal your hair and use it to tie up the asthma kids.”

In the same show, Colbert also turned his attention to a conversation between Donald Trump and Elon Musk on X Space, held on Monday night. During this event, Trump repeated many of his usual grievances and false claims.

“Last night was a big night for weird old rich guys with no friends,” Colbert quipped, highlighting that Trump had only posted once on X since being reinstated by Musk following his ban after the January 6 Capitol riot. The event itself took 40 minutes to get started due to technical difficulties, which Colbert did not hesitate to mock.

Listeners who managed to join the event were treated to an additional half an hour of lo-fi tech music coming from Trump’s account. “We actually have a clip of that music,” Colbert declared, playing the tune to riotous laughter from his audience.

Continuing the joke, a voiceover mimicking a call center helpline played: “Thank you for tuning into the Musk-Trump livestream. Your racism is very important to us, please continue to hold. Para español, report to your local detention camp.”

Colbert labeled the interview a “steaming c**p sandwich,” pointing to Musk’s claim that the technical issues stemmed from a “massive distributed denial of service” cyber attack, which purportedly “saturated” all their “data lines.” Colbert ridiculed this, saying, “Now if that sounds made up to you… good ear.”

Not just the technical logistics, but the actual conversation too, was a “cluster munch,” according to Colbert. He highlighted other bizarre moments from the interview, such as Trump appearing to have developed a lisp and making strange comments about how “beautiful” Harris resembles his wife, Melania.

Source: The Independent, Yahoo News