What Would I Say if I Met the Talented Mr. Kwarteng? Here’s the Outcome

When the chips are down, the pen is dry, or I need a cheap laugh, I’ve often been able to rely on one ace: Kwasi Kwarteng. He is not only the first Black chancellor but still holds the title of the most powerful Black person in British history, even if it was for a brief period.

I might not have been kind in the past. In my 2019 satirical book “Think Like a White Man,” I made several jabs at Kwarteng, including quips about his hairline. These critiques were never personal since I hadn’t met him — until 5:55am on a Thursday at the studios of Good Morning Britain, where we were both scheduled for a political panel.

Upon meeting him, I found Kwarteng to be “different.” He embodies the usual traits of upper-middle-class rightwing Black conservatism: contrarian, excessively confident, assertive, stubborn, and intellectually robust on many topics, but usually not on race. However, an added layer of eccentricity sets him apart from his peers.

For instance, as part of his post-political rehabilitation, most fallen politicians would choose reality TV shows like Strictly Come Dancing or I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here! Yet, Kwarteng chose the serious environment of back-to-back episodes of Good Morning Britain.

When he arrived, his considerable height filled the green room more than his presence or personality did. Friendly but distant, he showed no signs of the camaraderie that Black people usually share in such situations. He repeatedly mispronounced my name, emphasizing he had no idea who I was.

On air, things took a strange turn. He spoke of “accountability” and “responsibility,” yet fell back on distant language when he needed to be most accountable. For example, he said, “In terms of the strategic goal to get growth by supply-side reforms and to lower the tax burden, I still believe in that. But the way it [his disastrous mini-budget] was rolled out was frankly not disciplined enough and not rigorous enough.” Who rolled it out if not Kwarteng himself?

When I asked if he was embarrassed by the budget debacle or its impact, he promptly said he wasn’t. This response surprised me and Adil Ray, the show’s presenter.

Was it arrogance, lack of awareness, or strategic amnesia? We all wondered but received no clear answer.

I then posed a taboo question: Did he regret the sentiment that he and his rise had served as cover for racist policies? He firmly denied ever being the face of such policies, yet he still supports the deeply racist Rwanda plan and laments its cancellation. How does he reconcile that? I don’t know.

By the end of our half-hour sparring session, Kwarteng and I were as cordial as possible given the circumstances. We even joked about starting a podcast together, perhaps titled “Life in the Long Grass” or “The Rest is Interest Rates.”

Off-air, he continued to challenge me to get involved in politics rather than just commenting from the sidelines—a strange challenge from someone ejected from frontline politics and now seeking solace in commentary.

Kwarteng is far from a sympathetic figure, but I found him charming in a “different” manner. He doesn’t seem to seek sympathy or camaraderie.

We parted ways, me heading to the office and him, presumably, searching for a route back to respectability. He’ll need a lot of luck and a really good satnav.

Source: The Guardian