Ruth Westheimer, Renowned Sex Expert, Passes Away at 96

Ruth Westheimer, the widely known sex therapist who shot to fame in the 1980s with her straightforward advice on improving one’s sex life, has passed away, as reported by US media on Saturday. She was 96 years old.

According to People magazine, citing her publicist and sometime co-author Pierre Lehu, she died on Friday. The cause of death was not disclosed, but other sources mentioned she died at home in New York City with her family by her side.

The German-born Westheimer lost her parents in the Holocaust but managed to achieve fame in her 50s with a pioneering New York City radio show titled “Sexually Speaking.”

Known to many simply as Dr. Ruth, she leveraged her late-blooming fame to host a television show, appear in numerous films, and author approximately 40 books focused on achieving a fulfilling sex life.

Westheimer, standing at just 4-foot-7 (1.4 meters), had a trusting presence due to her matronly appearance and cheerful demeanor, making her a beloved figure for open conversations about intimacy.

Her life was full of dramatic turns, from escaping Nazi Germany as a Jewish refugee to serving as a sniper in the Israeli army. Later, she worked as a housekeeper in New York City before earning her doctorate from Columbia University and embarking on her career as a sex therapist.

Even in her 90s, she remained active and relevant, telling People magazine in a 2023 interview that “talking about sex from morning ’til night” kept her youthful.

Born Karola Ruth Siegel on June 4, 1928, in Wiesenfeld, Germany, she was the only child of Orthodox Jewish parents. Her father was taken to a concentration camp when she was just 10 years old, shortly after Kristallnacht. Her mother and grandmother then sent her to an orphanage in Switzerland, and she never saw her parents again.

After the war, she emigrated to British-controlled Palestine where she trained with an underground Zionist group for military action and was injured in an explosion during the conflict that led to Israel’s independence.

In 1950, she moved to Paris with her husband, an Israeli soldier, and studied at the Sorbonne. After a divorce, she moved to New York City, raising her daughter Miriam from a brief second marriage.

Her third marriage in 1961 to fellow Jewish refugee and Holocaust survivor Manfred Westheimer lasted until his death in 1997, and they had a son named Joel.

Westheimer worked alongside pioneering sex therapist Helen Singer Kaplan before debuting her New York radio show in 1980.

It took just under two years for her to become a household name, with national syndication for both her radio and television shows.

Dr. Ruth captivated a nation eager for straightforward discussions about female orgasm, masturbation, homosexuality, consent, and other bedroom matters.

Her nonjudgmental and pithy advice, such as recommending sex before dinner, sharing fantasies, and being open-minded with partners, resonated with many.

She avoided the word “normal,” believing that any consensual act between adults in privacy was acceptable and controversially supported legalized prostitution.

Her book “Sex for Dummies” was translated into 17 languages.

However, in the wake of the #MeToo movement, some were critical of Westheimer’s perspectives on consent.

“This idea that once you are aroused and have already started, that you should then ask, ‘Can I touch your left breast, or your right breast?’ is just nonsense,” she said to The Guardian in 2019.

Westheimer loved her children and grandchildren, sharing her life story with them, including her experience as a sniper fighting for Israel’s independence.

“I was a very good shooter. I once went with my grandson to a county fair where you shoot a water pistol at the clown’s mouth. We came home with 12 stuffed animals and a goldfish,” she recalled.

Playboy magazine recognized her significance in the field by listing her as Number 13 in its roundup of the 55 most important people in sex from the past 55 years.

A one-woman play titled “Becoming Dr. Ruth” ran off-Broadway in 2013, and a documentary called “Ask Dr. Ruth” was released in 2019.

She made numerous television appearances on shows such as “Ally McBeal” and “Melrose Place” and even had cameos in various movies.

Dr. Ruth constantly expressed her gratitude for surviving the Holocaust and felt compelled to give something back to society.

“I did not know that my eventual contribution to the world would be to talk about orgasms and erections, but I did know I had to do something for others to justify being alive,” she told the Harvard Business Review in 2016.